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All throughout their journey with him, the disciples must have perceived that Jesus was untouchable, and that he was a warrior. They had witnessed great miracles such as demons being defeated, Jesus’s walking on water, the blind receiving their sight, the lame walking, and his courage when he called out the Pharisees and Sadducees etc. These among other things gave them courage to leave everything behind and follow this messiah, the promised King who would redeem Israel. However, when he was being beaten, humiliated, crucified on the cross, their perspective of him was confronted. When you hear words like “he saved others, but he cannot save himself” (Matthew 27: 42) you can almost understand how confused his followers were and why they all had to scatter! They lost their faith in Jesus and his kingdom. The person who they considered a Savior showed himself weak and defeated. So, they disconnected themselves from him and denied him. Even one of his best friends (Peter) denied him 3 times! On one hand, it appears that Jesus had let his followers down and on the other hand, they had in turn let Jesus down. Aren’t these the two tensions that we often encounter during our spiritual journey? Letting God down and feeling like he has let us down.

In my favorite sermon this week, I analyze a teaching from pastor Steven Furtick (SF) titled, “Life After the Let Down” (John 20:30-21:14, Luke 5:4-5). SF assesses that while to the disciples; the cross was an unmet expectation and a disappointment, it is a source of comfort to us who now know the whole story.

Our perspective of God varies from time to time. There is the perspective we have of him when we are going through trials and the one, we have after the trial when we have overcome and seen the reason behind the suffering. The latter is an amazing place to be. The place where everything has finally come together and you praise God knowing that it was all worth it all. Which is an advantage we get to have over the disciples in the celebration of the Easter season. However, the former makes many of us perceive God as a foreigner when we don’t understand his ways or his word (the bible). So, in such cases, we run from him and go back to what is familiar-our old lifestyle. For instance, the bible tells us in John 6: 53-60, that many of Jesus‘s followers turned back and left him when he started to talk about how he was the bread of life and how they had to eat him to have eternal life. To be honest I understand that his message must have been confusing to those who had not connected with him on a deeper level and spent much time with him.

In addition, we often feel like God has let us down when we are suffering, when we lose our loved ones, after praying and fasting for their healing, when we lose our jobs, when we suffer with anxiety, depression, etc. These moments can make us feel like this powerful, all healing God isn’t who he says he is. These are the moments when our faith is tested. The enemy preys on such moments. He will feed our minds with lies that feed our fears and doubts. In a similar way, we, like Peter, may sometimes feel like we have let God down. In these moments, the enemy makes us feel unworthy of his love and grace. We start to think of all the things that God has done for us and beat ourselves up for taking his love for granted. When Peter denied Jesus, he bitterly wept. He probably felt like he had lost his faith and hope and was unworthy. But the bible shows us that sinning and feelings of letting God down are not the end. SF tells us, “You can’t let God down, you aren’t the one holding him up!” He reminds us that before God called and chose us, he knew how and when we would let him down, but he chose us anyway. He adds, “to disappoint God, would mean that you had something deep down inside that he didn’t see,” which of course is impossible since God is all-knowing (Omniscient) and all-seeing. I am learning that when we believe this truth, the enemy will not prey on us or our fears because we know who we are in Christ. We would keep moving forward in faith, knowing that no matter what we have done in the past or what we still struggle with, God can still use us because he created us for a purpose.

Therefore, do not disqualify yourself from his grace because he already knew that you weren’t perfect when he created and chose you. Similarly, when you feel let down by God, you need to remind yourself that he is the director of your life and that you need to trust his ways-no matter how complicated the situation may be. The bible tells us that Jesus himself felt like he had been forsaken by God when he was on the cross going through the greatest trial. He cried out, “my God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27: 46 and Mark 15:34). He was going through unimaginable pain, physically and emotionally. But Jesus knew one thing that we often forget. He knew that his pain had a purpose. This purpose was to save you and me! Because he knew this, he chose to surrender to God’s will even when his human body could barely handle it. While he was praying in the garden of gethsemane, Jesus-knowing all that was about to happen-asked if God could take the cup of suffering from him, but he surrendered to his father’s will (Matthew 26:59). This should be a lesson to us in times of despair.

I pray that God may give you the courage to go through such dark seasons, with hope and trust in him and that you may always know that there is nothing you can do that will make him take his grace away from you. It is yours to keep and it is sufficient! Amen!

With love and prayers,

Resty Kansiime

Here is today’s sermon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mmh053Jd7hs